New job ideas

With the awesome announcement of yet 500 more layoffs, I have been considering my future.

Here are the top five jobs I will consider,

1) birthday train conductor. Yours truly is ready to build a train. (dad, may I have your golf cart and lawn mower?)

2) florist... I always have thought this would be a fun job and my dad works in an industry where he could get me some customers.

3). Errand runner.... I was always responsible for buying cigs and beer for my very good old lady friend, Virginia. I figured there are lots of seniors that need beer and can't drive.

4). Poem writer. Do you need to make a toast? For a birthday, wedding, or roast? I will help you, so you can be proud. When you get up and speak to a crowd.

5). last but not least, I have considered being a critic. I like to read, eat, and watch movies. I would be willing to review things for pay. This one seems like a bit of a longshot. Really, only my mom cares what I think of movies and books. However, in most of my new job options she will probably be my only customer...